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  #151  
Old 20th November 2016
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Sorry to hear this bro. But to be frank I am not surprised. When I heard your story first I was almost sure your wife was having an affair. All is not lost yet. As you said you are ready to forgive her you marriage is not in danger. But please dont forgive her at once she may take it for granted. Make sure she has come out of that relationship. As another reader mention confirm with her if it is just sex or does she love him. If she loves him then no use living with the bi**ch (Sorry but if she loves someone else after marriage that is the truth). A guy is never going to love another married women. For him she is just a slut and he will use her not live with her. You are her only hope. Make her understand that.

And if you ask me dont trust her completely ever again. Keep a check on her every now and then. Have a baby ASAP that might solve the gap between you two. I hope everything will be fine in your life.
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  #152  
Old 28th November 2016
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Hi I'm Sorry to hear about your things, It will be very difficult and not possible to say love you to her after her confession, Its better to put things in the past to move forward, If she don't want to leave you better change the place where you live, And try to start over, If you are doing business ask her to join in your business and make her mind occupy if not try to have baby ASAP tat should make her mind to be in stable. I know you are hurt but please don't hurt her by keeping tabs on her its better you can ask her to leave you. If you really loved her don't keeps tabs on her on the contrary be a better person than him (Your wife had affair) Its my opinion i may be wrong too. Don't beat your self and be in a family like a roommates its better to be part ways.

  #153  
Old 28th November 2016
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Originally Posted by Nandy89 View Post
Hi I'm Sorry to hear about your things, It will be very difficult and not possible to say love you to her after her confession, Its better to put things in the past to move forward, If she don't want to leave you better change the place where you live, And try to start over, If you are doing business ask her to join in your business and make her mind occupy if not try to have baby ASAP tat should make her mind to be in stable. I know you are hurt but please don't hurt her by keeping tabs on her its better you can ask her to leave you. If you really loved her don't keeps tabs on her on the contrary be a better person than him (Your wife had affair) Its my opinion i may be wrong too. Don't beat your self and be in a family like a roommates its better to be part ways.

So much dubious advice here! Babies aren't for fixing problems!!

  #154  
Old 28th November 2016
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  #155  
Old 28th November 2016
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I agree with most of the other responses.....do not be hasty and tell her you will forgive. Since she is at fault, let her come up with a solution - and you can tell her that so she knows clearly that it is all up to her. Be strong and continue with the silence. Let her initiate discussions. Speak only when necessary. This is very normal behavior in such circumstances.

Let's be realistic. The problem is very difficult...if she is in love with him, she cannot just switch off and who knows how long it will take to get over him, if at all. In fact you will never really know.

If, as others say, it was lust, it didn't happen because she physically needed it. She had to have had some feelings for him to allow the situation to get physical. So, something that is in her mind and heart will not disappear now that she's been caught. Again, will she ever have feelings for you? Will you ever know that she has feelings for you? Will she remain loyal to you? Did she ever really "love" you or was it just a marital duty?

The fact that you're married makes her feel trapped now. She will be exploring all options now, including separation and divorce.. She is young enough to find someone else, to fall in love with someone else. People make rash decisions when under emotional stress. Be careful.

Earlier, you already told her that you still loved her, that you would forgive her, etc. Best to not keep saying that as it would appear to be begging, especially now that she is considering her options....and she already knows that you love her. You don't want to offer any compromises since she is the one at fault. She needs to earn your respect. As they say in One Minute Management, if there is a mistake made, then first a one minute admonishment and then a one minute goal setting. So she needs to suffer the consequences to understand her error. If there is no admonishment, there is no learning.

She must also be aware of the consequences of your two families finding out, and your immediate society. She had the guts to cheat on you for a whole year, do not discount the fact that she could also go it alone. In these modern times, being young and divorced means she'll be free to do as she likes with whoever she wants, to play for sometime while she finds someone she can fall in love with. Just that traditional society will look at her negatively is hardly a concern...look at how many couples live out of wedlock before they marry...and not necessarily the one they lived with.

For you, also being young, divorce will be less of a stigma as you can say that your ex-wife was at fault.

So be careful, consider very carefully, take time to decide, if she commits to stay it will take a long time to heal and regain trust (both ways).

Good luck.

  #156  
Old 17th March 2018
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pondatti_Dasan View Post
Hi Friends,

I am a new member in this forum. I have been browsing this forum for many years but didnt find the need to create an account. Now I need help and suggestion from members here as I dont know who I could ask these doubts.

Now coming to my problem, I am 31 years old and my wife is 29 (She is very good looking and sexy too). We have been married for 5 years. We are having a happy life till a few months ago. Now my main problem is I think my wife is cheating on me. Please dont think that I am a suspecting husband always keeping eye on wife. I love her a lot and will love her no matter what but with this doubt in mind I cannot do anything. It keeps pestering me. We always have a god sex life too. Nothing super human or kinky stuff like in porn but a perfectly normal sex life where both me and my wife attain orgasm. We dont even have any emotional problems between us and I dont know what is the reason for her to cheat me. Let me tell the reasons why I think she is having sex with someone else.

1) For the past few months she has been avoiding having sex with me. This has never happened in 5 years of our marriage and I even spoke to her about it but she says everything is OK. She doesnt have any health problems it just looks like she has no interest in sex with me.

2) She has started to talk about sex with others like a fantasy in rare occasion that we have sex ( Nowadays only 2-3 times a month). I know its not just a fantasy because we have been browsing Xossip from the time we got married( When site was Exbii) She hated threesome or cheating thread and videos. Trust me I know she had zero interest in that but now she talks sex with others when I fuck her. Later she says just a fantasy.

3) Two of my neighbours said about a guy who visits my home almost daily. I am not a kind of guy who trust what neighbours say and I think spying on wife is a disgusting thing but I cant just ignore what others say right? That too neighbours are old couple and not gossip type and they didnt even complain they just asked if any of my relative lives with us because a guys comes home everyday.

4) After all these things I count not control my suspicion and checked security entry logs to my home in appartment office. To my complete shock almost everyday there has been an entry to my house and exit is only after 3 hours. But there is no entry in weekends only. And to even increase my heartbreak there have been three different guys who have been visiting my house regularly. I cant even imagine my wife like that but I cant deny this proof also.

5) And lastly, once I found a used condom in the sun-shade near our terrace. As it is an appartment it can be someone else also. But with all other things I dont know what to think.

I need suggestion from you guys help me with the way forward. Is my suspicion true or is there some other explaination. I still love my wife and want it all to be false but I dont know. Help me people. Sorry for this long post but I have nowhere else to go with this problem.

P.S: I have been using this site and have had wife swap fantasy and everything. But thinking it is happening really is something else and believe me its not at all a good feeling.
I am experiencing the same incident where my gf not allowing me to touch her and spending more time with her office friends

  #157  
Old 18th March 2018
jsmithfb jsmithfb is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pondatti_Dasan View Post
Hi Friends,

I am a new member in this forum. I have been browsing this forum for many years but didnt find the need to create an account. Now I need help and suggestion from members here as I dont know who I could ask these doubts.

Now coming to my problem, I am 31 years old and my wife is 29 (She is very good looking and sexy too). We have been married for 5 years. We are having a happy life till a few months ago. Now my main problem is I think my wife is cheating on me. Please dont think that I am a suspecting husband always keeping eye on wife. I love her a lot and will love her no matter what but with this doubt in mind I cannot do anything. It keeps pestering me. We always have a god sex life too. Nothing super human or kinky stuff like in porn but a perfectly normal sex life where both me and my wife attain orgasm. We dont even have any emotional problems between us and I dont know what is the reason for her to cheat me. Let me tell the reasons why I think she is having sex with someone else.

1) For the past few months she has been avoiding having sex with me. This has never happened in 5 years of our marriage and I even spoke to her about it but she says everything is OK. She doesnt have any health problems it just looks like she has no interest in sex with me.

2) She has started to talk about sex with others like a fantasy in rare occasion that we have sex ( Nowadays only 2-3 times a month). I know its not just a fantasy because we have been browsing Xossip from the time we got married( When site was Exbii) She hated threesome or cheating thread and videos. Trust me I know she had zero interest in that but now she talks sex with others when I fuck her. Later she says just a fantasy.

3) Two of my neighbours said about a guy who visits my home almost daily. I am not a kind of guy who trust what neighbours say and I think spying on wife is a disgusting thing but I cant just ignore what others say right? That too neighbours are old couple and not gossip type and they didnt even complain they just asked if any of my relative lives with us because a guys comes home everyday.

4) After all these things I count not control my suspicion and checked security entry logs to my home in appartment office. To my complete shock almost everyday there has been an entry to my house and exit is only after 3 hours. But there is no entry in weekends only. And to even increase my heartbreak there have been three different guys who have been visiting my house regularly. I cant even imagine my wife like that but I cant deny this proof also.

5) And lastly, once I found a used condom in the sun-shade near our terrace. As it is an appartment it can be someone else also. But with all other things I dont know what to think.

I need suggestion from you guys help me with the way forward. Is my suspicion true or is there some other explaination. I still love my wife and want it all to be false but I dont know. Help me people. Sorry for this long post but I have nowhere else to go with this problem.

P.S: I have been using this site and have had wife swap fantasy and everything. But thinking it is happening really is something else and believe me its not at all a good feeling.

lett me answer you r point with what i thnk

1) maybe shes just too bored of u, you are not giving her enough, or she found a better person outside who is better in bed than you are. then u have no rights on her, she will keep aavoding sex with u as she can get better things from the other men, or simplly she maybe in an affair and videoed and being black mailed

2) well this bring me back to the first point which i said, she found someone who is manlier and better in bed than u so she is recalling him while using u as merely a sextoy, while concentrating on the guy who is really giving her what she wants, and thats the reason for her to talk about others while USING u, as i will say rather than have sex with u

3)well this point which u said only strengthens both my points as before , she is getting what she is needs from other men surely,, but note at this point , ,what u have to be sure is that is it the same men or different men taking chances...

4)facts vs feeling always facts will be right, and just as before i asked , u have realised its 3 different men who are taking turn on ur wife to give her what she needs rather than what she wants, as u are incapable of giving it, she is utilizing them on weekdays once u are off to work , shes having sex with them , so i will say pretty much dont listen to ur feeling as only facts have presented to ur self

5) well i will strongly say its someone elses cuz three men and one condom dosent make sense,, and seeing from ur wifes activites i will guess and be sure she let them bareback her, meaning she had sex without any condoms and as u know raw feeling is the greatest.

my advice to u is , not to live in denial. but rather still continue loving her , infact love her more from now , and accept that u cant fullfill her needs in bed and accept and give her , herspace too ,, jsut because she is haveing sex with men and not u should make u sad rather it should make ur love strong i will say .. if in doubt feel free to ask me
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  #158  
Old 18th March 2018
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jsmithfb View Post

lett me answer you r point with what i thnk

1) maybe shes just too bored of u, you are not giving her enough, or she found a better person outside who is better in bed than you are. then u have no rights on her, she will keep aavoding sex with u as she can get better things from the other men, or simplly she maybe in an affair and videoed and being black mailed

2) well this bring me back to the first point which i said, she found someone who is manlier and better in bed than u so she is recalling him while using u as merely a sextoy, while concentrating on the guy who is really giving her what she wants, and thats the reason for her to talk about others while USING u, as i will say rather than have sex with u

3)well this point which u said only strengthens both my points as before , she is getting what she is needs from other men surely,, but note at this point , ,what u have to be sure is that is it the same men or different men taking chances...

4)facts vs feeling always facts will be right, and just as before i asked , u have realised its 3 different men who are taking turn on ur wife to give her what she needs rather than what she wants, as u are incapable of giving it, she is utilizing them on weekdays once u are off to work , shes having sex with them , so i will say pretty much dont listen to ur feeling as only facts have presented to ur self

5) well i will strongly say its someone elses cuz three men and one condom dosent make sense,, and seeing from ur wifes activites i will guess and be sure she let them bareback her, meaning she had sex without any condoms and as u know raw feeling is the greatest.

my advice to u is , not to live in denial. but rather still continue loving her , infact love her more from now , and accept that u cant fullfill her needs in bed and accept and give her , herspace too ,, jsut because she is haveing sex with men and not u should make u sad rather it should make ur love strong i will say .. if in doubt feel free to ask me
Old thread...must be over by now. But item 4, about three different guys...makes me think she's made "friends" online after she got exposed to Xossip. Unfortunately, this stuff is very common these days.....everyone has a cell phone or internet access, password protected, secure browsing and video sex, very easy for cheating. May even be for money....heck, might as well enjoy while earning! Internet is a huge benefit to us but some aspects are making it so much easier to cheat. Sad....
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1. Unwanted Houseguest Continued - New https://xossip.com/showthread.php?t=1496293
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  #159  
Old 18th March 2018
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Quote:
Originally Posted by breville1 View Post
Old thread...must be over by now. But item 4, about three different guys...makes me think she's made "friends" online after she got exposed to Xossip. Unfortunately, this stuff is very common these days.....everyone has a cell phone or internet access, password protected, secure browsing and video sex, very easy for cheating. May even be for money....heck, might as well enjoy while earning! Internet is a huge benefit to us but some aspects are making it so much easier to cheat. Sad....
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